Whether we like it or not, we often encounter deception. They always try to fool us and in everything. Don't go far: take advertising as an example. How beautiful and interesting they describe the miraculous effects of any product! Dear girls, have you often felt the effect of miracle shampoos or creams? Surely not.
In everyday life, in communication with other people, we also often encounter this unpleasant moment. Sometimes, when you know for sure that a person is lying, hatred and disgust wake up to him, but sometimes you want to bring the deceiver to clean water. We devote this article to how to understand that a person is lying. Psychology is precisely the science that will help us figure this out.
Communication psychology
Our communication consists of several elements that can be divided into two large categories:
- verbal communication;
- non-verbal communication.
Verbal communication plays a small role in the conversation, it is the words themselves that we pronounce. Non-verbal communication occupies the lion's share of communications. It includes:
- facial expressions;
- movement
- gestures;
- gait;
- pose;
- volume of speech;
- timbre, etc.
As it has already become clear, non-verbal communication is communication using body language. It is thanks to him that we can answer the following question: "How to understand that a person is lying?".
What gives us away?
If a person tells the truth, then he does it without hesitation, his voice sounds smooth and confident, he does not avoid direct contact with his interlocutor with his eyes. And when he tries to hide or trick something, then everything happens exactly the opposite. It is difficult for him to look in the eyes, his voice is trembling, the intonation and volume changes, trying to come up with something on the go, he stumbles, gets confused. Trying to behave naturally, a person makes many different gestures that are completely unusual for him. Very often they give out a liar during a dialogue of facial expressions and posture.
We easily reveal the lies of our loved ones, because we communicate with them daily, we know how they talk openly and heart to heart, but if we see a person for the first time in our life, then we have difficulty recognizing lies. How to understand if a person is lying, if we know him only a few minutes?
Lies or embarrassment?
When we meet a new person, we often come across the fact that the dialogue is not quite smoothly glued. There are shy and shy people for whom a new acquaintance is a real test of strength. Many can take isolation for a lie.
Everyone knows that the pose in which the person is talking, says a lot about who is in front of us. So the poses of a liar, a person hiding something and just a shy person who tells you the truth, are very similar. Do not judge a person by the first minutes of communication. It takes time to understand and understand.
How to understand that a person is lying? If gestures and posture do not give us a liar in the first minutes, then facial expressions and eyes can reveal all his secrets to us.
Facial expressions
Changes in our face, emotions can tell our interlocutor whether we are truthful. How to understand by facial expressions that a person is lying? The facial expressions that tell us about lies can be counted on the fingers. Consider the most significant of them.
Asymmetry. No matter how hard we try, we won’t be able to play any feeling. If a person is sincere, if he is really experiencing any emotions, then he will not be able to hide them. Another thing is a deceiver, he does not worry, but tries to portray, so the muscles of his face begin to give out, there is a lack of synchronism. A smile will be more like a smirk, etc.
DurationThe duration of an emotion on a person’s face says a lot. True feelings are short-lived, with the exception of extremes such as deep depression, anger, etc. If you see the same emotion on the face of the interlocutor for more than ten seconds, then be sure that he is lying.
How to understand that a person is lying because of the lack of synchronism of emotions, words and movements? If a person first speaks, and then shows emotion, then this indicates that he is lying. We are doing it at a subconscious level at the same time.
Stupid smile. This phenomenon is familiar to many. Often a smile arises on a person's face if tension increases during a dialogue. For example, when reporting a sad, bad message, a person can smile, this does not mean that his words are not true, it indicates that the person is very upset. So are the deceivers. As you know, if a person is lying, then the tension rises to remove it, he puts on this mask. Another option is possible: a person smiles when he wants to express respect for the interlocutor, such a smile is different from a sincere one.
Eye contact. When we have nothing to hide, we don’t avoid direct eye contact, but the deceiver cannot talk like that with his interlocutor. Let us consider this question in more detail below.
How to understand that a person is lying in the eyes?
As you know, eyes are a mirror of the soul. No matter how hard we try to hide something, they will always tell the truth. So, how to understand that a person is lying, if you look only in his eyes?
As mentioned above, a person who does not hide anything will not hide his eyes. Most of the dialogue takes place with direct contact with the eyes of the interlocutors. If, while talking with you, a person looks away at the ceiling, at the floor, sideways, or looks as though over your shoulder, then this indicates that he is lying. If you want to check it out, then just ask a question that concerns what it is hiding. The liar will look away to quickly come up with an answer that sounds more believable.
How to understand by gestures that a person is lying
Body language tells us a lot. A very telling example is negotiation.
If the interlocutor rubs his forehead, then he makes a decision. If he taps his fingers on the table, he’s nervous. If you rub the glasses, then this suggests that it is better to wait a bit. If you hold open palms towards you or lean back in the chair, then this indicates that he fully supports you in the decision.
There are a lot of such talking gestures, they all mean something, we make these movements involuntarily on a subconscious level.
There are several common gestures of lies: rubbing your nose, chin, sorting out your clothes, collar, rubbing your knees if you are sitting. Pay attention to how your interlocutor behaves. If the gestures that he shows are unusual for him, then this indicates that he is deceiving you.
Vote
Pay attention to the pauses that your interlocutor makes. Very frequent and lengthy say that a person does not know the right answer to the question. During pauses, he wins time with the goal of coming up with such an answer that he fully satisfies you. Weighs the pros and cons. When a person tells the truth, the information that he really knows, then there will be no pauses and hesitations in his voice.
We always and everywhere encounter a lie, it is very important to learn to recognize it and bring deceivers to clean water.
